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SNF Week 2: San Francisco 49ers @ Seattle Seahawks
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SoS


Joined: 20 Apr 2013
Posts: 3751
Location: Sleepless in Seattle
PostPosted: Wed Sep 11, 2013 3:37 pm    Post subject: SNF Week 2: San Francisco 49ers @ Seattle Seahawks Reply with quote




YOUR Seattle Seahawks

VS.


San Francisco 49ers (eww)


Focus...


Determination...


...Domination





And now it's....



Story Time! With the artist formerly known as Save our Sonics.


Hey kids! This is a story based in the future! Ooooooo the future. We have our Ruler, Pete Carroll. Our sharpshooting sniper, Russell Wilson. And of course, the defenders of the galaxy.....



No! Goodness, not the Guardians of the Galaxy, though I'm sure that fiesty little raccoon could slap Frank Gore around a little bit.

No, I'm talking about something much more terrifying than a raccoon with guns. Something much worse than a giant tree with a three word vocabulary. I'm talking about something many believe to be little more than urban myth.......ghost stories.....a tall glass of fiction served with a side of hyperbole! But believe me you....this is no ghost story.....it's......



Oh yes, cringe as you may! The Legion of Boom was once thought of as the galaxies last line of defense. A foursome only called upon for the most despicable, vile, wretched villains to ever complain incessantly about whatever could possibly be complained about...ranging from wannabe QB bounties to not having enough baby powder in his diaper. That's right kids.....it's Jim Harbaugh and the Forty-Whiners.



Ewww. I know kids, it's tough to look at a face so full of tears and whining. His greatest power is actually to cry until the oppositions' ears actually begin to bleed from the inside out. He is truly an ugly, annoying creature that most generally avoid and strongly dislike.

I'll tell this story from the middle, perhaps go back to the beginning, continue on from the middle, give a flash forward to the end, and then start from the beginning and continue on chronologically from there filling in any potential plot holes I may have missed.

Actually that's not true.....I'm pretty much going to take us right near the end because you can imagine most of the beginning and middle is dominated by the S.W.A.T. division (otherwise known as Seahawks Win All the Time).



It all starts in the 4th quarter. The 49ers were already down 50-0 and the team was demoralized and stomped all over. They had defeat written across their faces and had accepted their feat as the 2nd, nay, 3rd best team in the NFC West (let's be real, those Rams are scarier than this bunch). The season had seemed lost, their hopes dashed and dismantled as they looked ahead to the 2014-2015 season. Early in 2013 it may be...the 49ers would never be able to recover from a big brother beating such as this one.

But Jim Harbaugh, try as he might, refused to surrender. He was hard-headed, mostly straight foolish in his naivety at times. And so he called on his final weapon....something many teams had feared in the past....the KaeperKracken!

[img][/img]

Hideous, isn't it!?

Harbaugh waited eagerly as his beast was summoned. Everyone else was fully aware that a comeback was literally impossible at this point, but Harbaugh was willing to put his best weapon in danger just to save a little face and not be completely embarrassed on national television.

But the beast never came.....Harbaugh was puzzled. Could it be that the KaeperKracken was permanently scared away from Seattle after his last encounter with the mighty 12th man and the large silver platter of destruction that was served upon him?

No! That wasn't it at all!

To Harbaugh's chagrin, the creature, so dimwitted and useless, accidentally went to the wrong battle site and was of no use! Instead the creature, for some unknown reason, arrived in a bared wasteland some know as.....




....Miami!



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SoS


Joined: 20 Apr 2013
Posts: 3751
Location: Sleepless in Seattle
PostPosted: Wed Sep 11, 2013 3:37 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Actual analysis to come later in the day, going out on the lake so did as much as I could for now!
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If I am a starting QB and my back up is Kellen Clemens..i would only have one question...."Turn up for what?"
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Finchy


Joined: 05 Jun 2013
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PostPosted: Wed Sep 11, 2013 3:42 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote



That is all.
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Billy Spikes


Joined: 12 Jul 2008
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PostPosted: Wed Sep 11, 2013 3:43 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Eyebrow bet between Kaepernick and Wilson... who ends up looking like this?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=npKvIE6Ys1M


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imani


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PostPosted: Wed Sep 11, 2013 4:24 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Seahawks going to take this game to the bank in the first half. The 49ers will keep it close and might even take the lead in the 1st quarter....but that's because Carroll and the Seahawks will be looking a week ahead to an opponent that really matters:

The Jaguars

Hope you liked your birthday present last year Harbaugh, we're going to be delivering another package while your in town


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SFaithful97


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PostPosted: Wed Sep 11, 2013 7:39 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

imani wrote:
Seahawks going to take this game to the bank in the first half. The 49ers will keep it close and might even take the lead in the 1st quarter....but that's because Carroll and the Seahawks will be looking a week ahead to an opponent that really matters:

The Jaguars

Hope you liked your birthday present last year Harbaugh, we're going to be delivering another package while your in town

Yes you guys are right. Carroll clearly is the class act of the NFC West. Laughing

Should be a fun game this week guys. Your offense looked slow out of the gate last week, and our running game and pass rush (despite a couple of sacks) were awful as well. I guess we will find out which team gets well first, and if it will be enough to win the game. I for one am glad to have this game be in Seattle and have the home game against you later in the year. For the 49ers to have the best chance, they have to start fast (something they have struggled with against the Hawks recently). If they can get a couple early scores and lessen the crowd noise, they will have a much better shot. Don't get too excited when Kaep wastes a TO or two/gets a delay of game penalty. It wasn't the 12th man, he does that at home too Laughing . I am excited to see if Kaep can turn in a good performance against a secondary like yours. We will need some of our secondary receivers to step up if that is going to happen, because I don't see another 200 yd performance from Boldin in the cards this game.

Anyways, good luck (not really) and hopefully there are no major injuries on either side. I don't want you guys to have any excuses when we mop the floor with you. Wink
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NINERFAN_4_LIFE


Joined: 02 Jan 2007
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Location: Buring the eternal flame Candlestick Park, wondering if I should throw my levis into the fire
PostPosted: Thu Sep 12, 2013 12:23 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

hhahahha the kaeperkracken! hilarious!


You are going to see a much different 49er team than you saw the last time we came to your place. that was the perfect storm for you guys as we were traveling across the country after a big, emotional game. you guys gave it to us, no doubt about it. I still believe we are the better team overall, which is why I think we will sweep you guys this year

hopefully you dont get away with a lot of contact by your secondary past 5 yards. I swear you guys get away with more than any other team in that regard. you shouldnt have to either as your secondary is def the best in the league. but I dont understand how they never call that against you... your corners mug our WRs everywhere they go... its why I want to use a lot of bunch sets and rub our WRs open. I also think we will have success on the ground.

Im tired of lynch running all over us. I think this week our defense shows up to play. Im going to say the final score is 31-17 49ers.

this sunday its time for .... THE EMPIRE STRIKES BACK

ALL HAIL KING KAEP


may the best team win Very Happy
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imani


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PostPosted: Thu Sep 12, 2013 1:05 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

NINERFAN_4_LIFE wrote:
hhahahha the kaeperkracken! hilarious!


You are going to see a much different 49er team than you saw the last time we came to your place. that was the perfect storm for you guys as we were traveling across the country after a big, emotional game. you guys gave it to us, no doubt about it. I still believe we are the better team overall, which is why I think we will sweep you guys this year

hopefully you dont get away with a lot of contact by your secondary past 5 yards. I swear you guys get away with more than any other team in that regard. you shouldnt have to either as your secondary is def the best in the league. but I dont understand how they never call that against you... your corners mug our WRs everywhere they go... its why I want to use a lot of bunch sets and rub our WRs open. I also think we will have success on the ground.

Im tired of lynch running all over us. I think this week our defense shows up to play. Im going to say the final score is 31-17 49ers.

this sunday its time for .... THE EMPIRE STRIKES BACK

ALL HAIL KING KAEP


may the best team win Very Happy


May the force be with you....on the jet you take back home with your tail between your legs.
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Ring Worm Sherm


Joined: 27 Apr 2013
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PostPosted: Thu Sep 12, 2013 2:57 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

NINERFAN_4_LIFE wrote:
hhahahha the kaeperkracken! hilarious!


You are going to see a much different 49er team than you saw the last time we came to your place. that was the perfect storm for you guys as we were traveling across the country after a big, emotional game. you guys gave it to us, no doubt about it. I still believe we are the better team overall, which is why I think we will sweep you guys this year

hopefully you dont get away with a lot of contact by your secondary past 5 yards. I swear you guys get away with more than any other team in that regard. you shouldnt have to either as your secondary is def the best in the league. but I dont understand how they never call that against you... your corners mug our WRs everywhere they go... its why I want to use a lot of bunch sets and rub our WRs open. I also think we will have success on the ground.

Im tired of lynch running all over us. I think this week our defense shows up to play. Im going to say the final score is 31-17 49ers.

this sunday its time for .... THE EMPIRE STRIKES BACK

ALL HAIL KING KAEP


may the best team win Very Happy


Lmfao....and your WRs don't initiate contact at all? Boldin was pushing off so much last week. My goodness. You guys are in denial.

My prediction is 35-17 hawks. Wilson is going to absolutely shred that secondary.
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sirensong


Joined: 13 Mar 2007
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PostPosted: Thu Sep 12, 2013 4:29 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Ring Worm Sherm wrote:
NINERFAN_4_LIFE wrote:
hhahahha the kaeperkracken! hilarious!


You are going to see a much different 49er team than you saw the last time we came to your place. that was the perfect storm for you guys as we were traveling across the country after a big, emotional game. you guys gave it to us, no doubt about it. I still believe we are the better team overall, which is why I think we will sweep you guys this year

hopefully you dont get away with a lot of contact by your secondary past 5 yards. I swear you guys get away with more than any other team in that regard. you shouldnt have to either as your secondary is def the best in the league. but I dont understand how they never call that against you... your corners mug our WRs everywhere they go... its why I want to use a lot of bunch sets and rub our WRs open. I also think we will have success on the ground.

Im tired of lynch running all over us. I think this week our defense shows up to play. Im going to say the final score is 31-17 49ers.

this sunday its time for .... THE EMPIRE STRIKES BACK

ALL HAIL KING KAEP


may the best team win Very Happy


Lmfao....and your WRs don't initiate contact at all? Boldin was pushing off so much last week. My goodness. You guys are in denial.

My prediction is 35-17 hawks. Wilson is going to absolutely shred that secondary.


49ers complaining about being overly physical is pretty funny...

Boldin was creating space for himself quite "physically" and I didnt see any complaining last week.

Don't come crying when Browner is punkin Boldin and b*tch with the stuff a guy like Justin Smith gets away with.
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Billy Spikes


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PostPosted: Thu Sep 12, 2013 9:29 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

49ers Anthony Dixon tweets he's 'preparing for these She-Hawks'

http://www.cbssports.com/nfl/eye-on-football/23607869/ers-anthony-dixon-tweets-hes-preparing-for-these-shehawks

What an idiot, he's also insulting almost half the 49ers fan base by saying that.
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TheoryofSeahawk


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PostPosted: Thu Sep 12, 2013 9:43 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

The only problem I have with players talking smack is that so many of them are friends in the off-season that it comes off as a bunch of fake tough guy antics. And I mean that for players on both sides. I don't believe most of it and I think it's laughable when players do it.

The person I'm really starting to have a problem with, though, is Jim Harbaugh. They guy obviously can coach. He's proven that. He's got a quality team, we've seen that. So why is he pandering himself to the media, talking like a crybaby about every team they face? Not just the 'Hawks, but the Giants last year, the Pack this year. His media personality is devolving into a whiny, feminine, drama queen-esque caricature who tries to buy calls second-hand through the media. It was low-class when Phil Jackson did it (and he was good at it) and it's still low class now.

As for the game. The O-line had better be putting in work this week. They are going to be the key to this game. If Sweezy, Giacomini, and Carpenter play like they did last week, it's going to be tough going on offense.

I don't think Kaepernick will be nearly as affected by the 12th man like he was last year. He's been though bigger games since then. I think the home crowd will definitely pump the 'Hawks up as usual, but I don't think it will crush the 49ers like it did last year.

Our D should be fine, if Browner and Avril play the full game, it should be even better. If our O-line can't help the O, the defense might be our best bet for getting a win.
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Tooki


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PostPosted: Thu Sep 12, 2013 10:05 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

From what I read (somewhere) Theory, Pete tried to implement some new tweaks into the run blocking scheme and it proved to be dreadful. Apparently it took the team a while to adjust and the team didn't get it going until the 4th quarter.

I just hope that Pete commits to a single lineup, because continuity is the key.
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Finchy


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PostPosted: Thu Sep 12, 2013 11:42 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Billy Spikes wrote:
49ers Anthony Dixon tweets he's 'preparing for these She-Hawks'

http://www.cbssports.com/nfl/eye-on-football/23607869/ers-anthony-dixon-tweets-hes-preparing-for-these-shehawks

What an idiot, he's also insulting almost half the 49ers fan base by saying that.


Worst.Insult.Ever
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klyon7634


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PostPosted: Thu Sep 12, 2013 3:28 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Billy Spikes wrote:
49ers Anthony Dixon tweets he's 'preparing for these She-Hawks'

http://www.cbssports.com/nfl/eye-on-football/23607869/ers-anthony-dixon-tweets-hes-preparing-for-these-shehawks

What an idiot, he's also insulting almost half the 49ers fan base by saying that.


Anthony who?
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