Gameday Thread: Rams vs Patriots

[Ramsfan28]

Rams (3-4)



VS

Patriots (4-3)






AND NOW WE PLAY IN JOLLY OL' LONDON!






And now...the tale of the Revolutionary War




It all began when some dudenator decided that "hey now, we're pretty tired of you guys pushing us around and making us pay."




And then some other broski was like, "hey, let's start a revolution!" This revolution began with the tarring and feathering of the governing body known as "The Cabinet Without a Winning Record"





The Rams were a colony team, looking to gain their independence as being relevant in the league. They sailed away from the land of mediocrity and found themselves in a desolate, dangerous place. A place where having an 0-6 record was unacceptable. To survive, they learned to live off the land and made trades with the local tribesman:





"Draft picks? Eeeewwww....we're tired of draft picks. Us natives have a saying. 'Less is more.' So here, take our draft picks, and we will have what is rightfully ours."


And so the Rams began to take their draft picks. And then they began to take more draft picks from some of the colonists who became enemies with the natives:





"Howdy. We be lookin' for a weapon to fight them injuns. Give us Claiborne, and we will fund your tribe with draft picks. Who is ya'lls leader anyway?"



The Cowboys were introduced to the newly appointed "Secretary of Stacheness" The local tribe had a name for him, "he who has upside down happy face above rightside up happy face."


Meanwhile, back on the other coast, the Redcoats were celebrating their tyranny over the weak.



"We love it when they try to come up against us! We just dominate them, and take whatever they have! This is OUR division!" All of the sudden, and letter arrived on the footsteps of Candlestick...Castle.... It said:

To whom it may concern,

We're tired of finishing dead last in the division. We're tired of being ran over. We're tired of all of this unfair treatment. We are establishing our independence. We seriously just had a big rally in this courthouse, got drunk, and signed a piece of paper called 'The Declaration of Inhale of My Farts and Gag While we Strive to go to the Big Dance" And that's all. Gator Boots, with the pimped out Gucci shoes (with them Gucci shoes) Ain't got no job, but I stay suave (Ehh-Ehh-Ehh-Ehh)

-Les Snead









When a bloodthirsty tyrant, named "Harbaugh III" read this, he only had one answer:




TWO WORDS. THIS MEANS WAR!


It was at this time the others in the division had to choose their alliances. France was still bitter about getting defeated by the colonists in the "Pete Carroll-Marshawn Lynch War", the first war in the history books that was given its' name by the enemies they were fighting.




And then there was the Spanish, who were totally cool sitting on the Western Half of the division, occupying territories, not realizing that one day they would be in the way of a "Manifest Destiny".




So now we have two mortal enemies going head to head...the 49ers, who reign supreme, vs. the Rams...who have declared their independence from being mediocre.


Destiny shall be decided...in TWO WEEKS! But for now, there is one more enemy to take care of, so now we shall skip the Revolutionary War and move onto the War of 2012, AKA the War 200 years after the War of 1812, because first we must defeat our enemy of the future before we defeat our enemy of the past!

CONFUSION!


In the War of 2012, the Rams are set up to go against the legendary Darth Hoodie.




With his powers of finding low level draft picks and turning them into key components for success, he bears with him his lightsaber of Super Bowl Rings, which had a +2 coaching skill, and -5 personality attributes. The Patriots were armed with a weapon which no Ram had a gameplan for taking down, General Gronkowski!





With his battle cry, "YO SOY FIESTA!" he drove fear into the hearts of mismatched safeties going up against him, trying to bring him down. So powerful, yet a puppet to the one named Brady.





And now we have our showdown, the Metaphorical Patriots of Mediocrity in Ramsfan28's world VS. the team actually named after those who fought to gain independence against the very country they will be playing in, the New England Patriots. I think we can all agree though, Ramsfan28's patriots sound much cooler, and Harbaugh III was a much better enemy than King George III. And that is, the backwards and very confusing story of where babies come from.

TNE END
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[maladeen3917]

best GDT hands down
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The Fastest Thing Under The Arch

[yrba1]

[24isthelaw]

[D9-EM]

Have you ever done any stand-up? Seriously man, your stuff is great!

[S-jax39]

[Wr80]

Is it Sunday yet?

[Bond_007x]

Great stuff! RF28

[DistantRam]

Great stuff, as always, RF28.

Any of you guys coming over to London for this one?
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I watched the Rams at Wembley and stayed until the bitter end.

[DEE RAWL]

Really wish this was in the dome
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[JLaurinaitis_55]

Best one yet hahahaha
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Welcome to St. Louis Austin, Ogletree, Bailey, Mcdonald, Stacy, McGee, and Jones

[Against_me]

Was going there, but finally I can´t cause of work. Hope we win
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Adopt a Ram:

Jo-Lonn Dunbar

114 tackles 4.5 sacks 2 ff 2 int 4 pdf 13 stf

[Billy Spikes]

Walt Coleman is the ref for the game.


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All Time Top Ten Safeties Ranking
Jennifer Lawrence Tribute Thread
Tom Brady Tribute Video

[ramsfan55]

[rAmFan39]

hahaha!! Love it!! Please pull this one out Fellas. My wife is a patriots fan and this win would make my month!
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^^Joe_is_the_best on the Sig